Do you set aside regular alone time with your partner? Career, job, and children often lessen the time you have for a relationship. If you’ve become busy recently, have you remembered to spend time with your partner one-on-one?[1] X Research source How often do you communicate with your partner? Oftentimes, we forgot to ask someone about their day or how they’re feeling when we’re very busy. Make sure you’re making an effort to reach out to your partner on a regular basis. [2] X Research source
Many believe they can’t be happy in a relationship until they work on improving or perfecting their partner’s bad qualities. However, this is not the case and can actually be damaging to a relationship longterm. Do you constantly remind your partner to, say, take out the recycling to no avail? If repeatedly talking and nagging does nothing to correct a minor bad behavior, you might have to learn to accept it. [3] X Research source Keep perspective. Some days, your partner’s constant lateness or sloppiness can seem unbearable, but try to remind yourself this is a mild matter in the grand scheme of things. When you’re frustrated, think to yourself, “Yes, my boyfriend/girlfriend is always running behind schedule, but he/she also always remembers to ask me about my dad, listens to my problems when I’m upset, and laughs at my jokes. That’s what’s really important. “[4] X Research source
Changing your style can help you feel attractive. Consider a new wardrobe, hairstyle, or make up. Going shopping and talking to a department store stylist can help. [5] X Research source Exercise and eat right. Even if you do not want to lose weight, people tend to feel more attractive when they feel healthy. [6] X Research source
Schedule a specific time for the talk and go in prepared to listen. If you want the spark in your romance back, you have to be willing to change. Rarely is a relationship rut completely one-sided. Remain calm and listen carefully to your partner’s needs and wants. [8] X Research source Talk about the times where you feel your partner loves and cares about you. Do you feel loved when your partner brings you flowers? Asks about your day? Holds your hand during movies? Let your partner know. [9] X Research source Talk about anything you would want to do more often. Would you like to spend more nights of the week together? Go out on more dates? Try new things together?[10] X Research source Are there any things you used to do together that you no longer do? Early in a relationship, you may feel compelled to engage in grand romantic gestures. Sending emotional texts, bringing your partner flowers, and staying up late talking are activities that we sometimes do less of the longer we’ve been with someone. If you’re missing these types of gestures, talk to your partner about trying to engage in them more often. [11] X Research source
Surprise outings, like dinner dates, concert trips, and going to museums Tell your partner one thing you like about him or her every day. For example, “I love how you yawn in the morning” or “I love how the coffee’s always ready because you remember to set up the pot before bed. “[12] X Research source If your partner is busy at work, do something to make things easier when they get home. Do the dishes or laundry. Take out the trash. Cook them dinner. [13] X Research source
Plan date nights. Oftentimes, the longer you’re with someone the less you date. Try to find fun new things to do together on dates. Take a pottery class. Go dancing. Take a day hike. Visit a neighboring town. [15] X Research source You can also reach out to others. Make plans with other couple friends. Join a club together where you can meet new people. Exploring a social life together is a great way to have fun in a relationship. [16] X Research source Have fun at home as well. Break out board games for nights in. Find a funny television show to watch. Do Mad Libs. [17] X Research source
Exploring new sexual positions. Watching pornography together. Role playing. Talking about sexual fantasies. Using sex toys.
Talk about how you met. Your personal love story can stir feelings of sentimentality and romance. Discuss how you first met, your initial impressions of one another, and share memories of your first date. [19] X Research source The conversation can be fairly easy to start. Simply say, “Remember the first night we met?” and go from there. Talk about what first attracted you to your partner, what your fondest memory of your early romance was, and what made you think the relationship was special. [20] X Research source
Listen to music that reminds you of the early stages of the romance. Did you two ever end up reading the same book? If so, read passages out loud to one another. Look at old photos and videos. Watch movies you watched when you first started dating. [21] X Research source
