Willingness to tell each other secrets, dreams, and thoughts. Sharing some of the same values. Frequent and honest communication, at least 1-2 a week. Calm, enjoyable conversation whenever you are face to face. Being able to be vulnerable with each other. A few hobbies and ideas that you both share and enjoy. [1] X Research source
Make sure this friend is reliable and won’t spread the news to any other friends before confiding in them.
If your crush is constantly talking about other lovers, crushes, or ex-partners, they may not be ready for a relationship either.
Ask them to help you get drinks, food, etc. for a party. Sit across or next from them at the dinner table. Ask them on casual “dates,” like exercising together, checking out a new bar, or helping out with a project/homework. [4] X Research source
Turning shoulders and hips to face each other. Making clear, consistent eye contact. Expressing positive emotions with each other through facial expressions, such as by smiling. Fixing, brushing, or playing with hair and clothing. Mimicking posture or speech patterns. Leaning in or close to each other. [5] X Research source
“I’ve really enjoyed our friendship, but I want to take things to another level. Would you want to go on a few dates?” “We’re great friends, but I have feelings for you beyond friendship. I would love the chance to get to know you even more on a date. " Even something as simple as “Let’s go out on a date next Thursday” can work perfectly. Except for large tragedies or life-changing events, there is no “perfect time” to ask someone out. Just go for it!
“I care about you and our friendship a lot, and I think we could be really good together. " “Getting to know you has been incredible, and I would love the chance to get to know you even more. " “You are a great person, and I’m very lucky to call you a friend.
If you think you can be friends again, you’ll still need to spend some time alone. Try not to hang out for several weeks and see what happens when you return. Though you shouldn’t expect to be best friends, time can help you get over your feelings and return to friendship. Know, however, that some people struggle to return to friendship after romance. This is unfortunately a risk you will need to take. [7] X Research source
Try beginning the conversation with your own needs, stating something like, “I know we’ve been friends for a while, but I am looking for something long-term. ” Follow up with, “What are you looking for in this relationship?” “How do you see things moving forward?”
If someone is moving too quickly for you, casually remind them that “Our friendship comes first, we’ve got plenty of time for everything else. " Just because you are dating now does not mean you need to spend every hour together. Keep your space and take things slowly. Keep remembering that a strong friendship makes the base of a strong relationship.
Make time for group activities, and maintain plans and traditions you had before dating. While you shouldn’t hide your relationship, you shouldn’t let it affect your other friends. Spend alone time with them and focus on other friends when you are in a large group. Be discreet – there is no need to tell your friends all of your “couple’s stories. " They don’t want to hear them and your partner might not want to share them like you do.
Maintaining a relationship takes time, energy, and work, but the payoff is a close-knit bond that is unique to just you.
Your friendship should stay intact no matter how romantic you become. [10] X Research source Make sure you are comfortable together. If you feel like you need new clothes, new lingo, or new hobbies to make them love you then you might be better off as friends.
